GSW Formation - version #3

It was noon on Wednesday when Dan pulled up to Fox studios in his dad's new Jaguar. The Pifers had just recently moved out to LA when Dan's father got promoted by the Time-Warner group. The move suited all of them well. Dan was late for his Beverly Hills 90210 audition, but he wasn't really that concerned because he figured the part of Dylan was pretty much his for the taking. He knew he was up against Luke Perry, that's why Dan took Luke out the previous night and got him pretty looped on Bourbon in order to get him real hungover. It worked. Luke looked like garbage. He was already doing a run through. He was unshaven and dirty. Dan went into the dressing room. He was looking slick. Hair combed back, his darkest shades, and his favorite suit out of Armani's casual line. He was really smoking. Luke read his parts, hung over and shaky. Dan just smiled off to the side. He knew the part would be his. He pictured himself doing love scenes with Shannon Dougherty (sic) (she had already been chosen). Life was good.....

Jon had just finished his third pool of the day. Hair, bugs and vomit were what he spent his days with. He cleaned pools. His dad had recently run out on his mom because he needed to pursue a career in rock and roll. He ended up playing drums with some weird heavy metal outfit called Accept. He made a load of cash co-writing 'Balls to the Wall' and ended up having an affair with Cheryl Tiegs. Jon and his mom held it together though. She was making a few bucks selling maps to the homes of the stars on a Beverly Hills street corner, and Jon subsidized her income by cleaning pools. It was an especially hot Wednesday. Jon was tired. He finished up pool number three and drowsily made his way over to pool four, on the lot of Fox studios.....

Jon's dad , who recently changed his name to Thor, was hanging out on the side of the stage watching the warm-up act. They were a group of three guys. A short guy, a robust guy, and a dirty guy. They were described in Circus magazine as 'an all star power trio'. They were good. They were tight. They were young. Thor grabbed them after their set, and sat them down backstage. He told them how great they were, how cool their image was, and how they would be a slam dunk success. They introduced themselves as Lo, Aaron, and Tom, and went off to have an immediate meeting. They decided that Thor was crazy, he was tactless, and they had no desire to appeal to him. They went full circle. They decided to become an up and coming neo-hippie band.....

Shannon sat on the couch with Dan and offered to read with him for the audition. Dan just coolly accepted. He was hot. They read. They sizzled. They smoked. They had the chemistry the Fox execs were looking for. He got the part. He went off to celebrate. Unfortunately as he was backing the Jag out of his spot, Jon was driving through the lot to clean the studio pool. Their was a problem though. Jon had fallen asleep behind the wheel about six seconds ago. He smashed hard into the Jaguar sending Dan face first into the steering wheel (if you look closely you can still see the scar on the bridge of his nose from the reconstructive surgery). But to make a long story short, Dan became ugly. It would be months before the finest surgeons of LA could piece him back together. Fox couldn't wait. Perry was in. Pifer was out. By the way, Jon came out of the accident with not so much as a scratch.....

Thor heard wind of the accident. He still cared for his son so he wanted to help him out. He knew he played a little piano so he decided to set something up. Accept had recently broken up due to internal discrepencies, not to mention Cheryl Tiegs dumped Thor for John Popper of Blues Traveler. But Accept had left a string of booked dates that needed to be filled. Thor offered these dates to the warm-up act from a while back, who had now taken on the name God Street Wine and began to make music that seemed to be a hybrid of Steely Dan type harmonies and Allman Brothers like guitar jams. They were so extremely pleased with their new comparisons that they were determined to become huge. They wanted the dates. Thor said there was a catch. 'My son gets to be in the band", he said. They winced, but later agreed thinking they would just keep him low in the mix and boot him when the time came. Jon agreed, but he too had a catch. Because of his guilty feelings from wrecking Dan's face, he insisted that Dan be in the band as well. At this point God Street Wine just said sure, accepted the new members, and headed out on their first tour. The rest would take care of itself.....